Lately my life has been pretty much reflecting the monthly caption in my flying fish calender. This month's caption says "I had God for my co-pilot.... till we crashed into a mountain and I had to eat him". It doesn't bode well for the month, does it.
Hello my baby Hello my darling Hello my rag-time gal
2nd April 2000
Yesterday was mostly just homeworking. Though I did take short breaks, one to go to the Gypsy Fair, and one to go to a friend's birthday. The birthday party was pretty cool, though I didn't stay long as I needed to get a good bit of sleep.
One word describes today. HOMEWORK. I spent all day until about six this evening working on my Romanticism essay, and then I finally finished it. Now I just have to do my Chem write-up and read all of Mary Shelley's Frankenstein and the whole Knight's Tale, all by 9am tomorrow. Joyful, joyful.
Superlove is something that they say is very rare In the dark, in your world it's everywhere And I feel like an x x rated movie star It's the way you love me down it's the way you love me down Everytime we kiss you bring out the woman in me Everytime you holler out my name you set me free I am sex-o-matic venus freak when I'm with you And I will stop it only when you tell me to I am the automatic easy freak all over you And I will stop it only when you tell me to
3rd April 2000
I am such a git. I made a right dork of myself in front of someone I've kinda liked for a while, and who I hadn't talked to since Shrove Tuesday (when I was drunk and also made quite a fool of myself). And then I get home and my chick-click horoscope says "Don't be shy and hide your smile, Sag. A little flirting will go a long way with a handsome stranger. You won't have to say much to make an impression." Well, I definately made an impression, it just wasn't a good one.
Though earlier in my day, things happened too. I woke late and jogged my paper run (I still managed to finish on time, which is all good). Watched Super Pig and then did some work on my chem assignment, which I later finished in my lab. My classes were rather uneventful. We had some Freud explained to us at Romanticism, and had the basis of the Chivalric Romance explained to us at Medieval Lit. Egg Noodles at the all you can eat Krshna feast, Yummmmmm.
I also noticed today that my ex has a superhuman ability to be wherever I am when I do something stupid, i.e. fall over in the union for no appearant reason, and I never notice till afterward. I quite suspect that my ex is using dark magicks to make me do stupid things. And I guess that's about my day. Later.
You were the love for certain of my life you were simply my beloved wife I don't know for certain how I'll live my life now alone without my beloved wife my beloved wife I can't believe I've lost the very best of me
5th April 2000
Yesterday I was being ULTRA PARANOID. On my way into Anglo-Saxons I talked to Elizabeth, who commented in passing of having talked to someone about me in the weekend, and they named my ex as the culprit. So then I spent the whole class wondering how I'd ended up the topic of conversation, to find out in the end that it had been in a conversation about ex's. Which just left me more paranoid, wondering what horrible things had been said about me.
Before the paranoia I had had a GREAT lunch with Nina. It was so good to catch up with her, I love her lots but really don't see enough of her anymore. So I had a great time talking to her about everything and nothing and sharing various satay foods. I really have to spend more time with her.
And those were pretty much the noteworthy events of Tuesday.
Tonight's bedtime story:
Then I met up with Kezia at lunch, and we decided we'd make a great couple, if only she wasn't a lesbian, as we are both so darn co-dependant. Well, stranger thing have happened, and she is a fox.
Then I went off and got my hair cut; while there my hairdresser somehow convinced me it was about time I got some colour. So here is me, who spends his life paying out the wearers of bad dye jobs, about to get a bad dye job. It's now the Lynette (my hairdresser) pulls out a giant rubber nibble and stetches it over my head. And then crochet hook my hair out through the lil' holes in it. Then, just for the glamour of it, the outside was painted up with bright blue paste. Damn, sexy.
Surprise, surprise it is right now that someone I know, in this case Kezia, arrives at Headquarters to make a hairdresser appointment of her own. So what does Matthew-wearer-of-the-worlds-sexiest-giant-rubber-nipple do? He waves. Talk about dumb. Anyway who had a brain would have just made themselves invisible.
Ergh, this evening I had a meeting for the Students For a Free Tibet exec. Dang I dispise being responsible. Anyway, I need sleep. Later.
How did I love you? there was no measuring far above this dirty world far above everything in your tower over it you were clean so warm and insightful were you in my eyes I was sure the rightful guardian of my life damn you betrayer how you lied but for seven years you were loved I laid golden orchid crowns around your feet
8th April 2000
Thursday happened, it was a long long time ago and I remember very little of it. I know I had some classes, and I sat with Elizabeth at Anglo-Saxon's - much to Midget's disgust. I got the definate feeling that Anita (Becky's lastest *.* - I'm not even going to try attributing a sensible title) really doesn't like/tolerate me much. And, umm, thats about all I can recall of Thursday.
Yesterday, I had two classes, both for ENGL211, and both on Mary Shelly's Frankenstein, and both quite fun. Then I came home and stuffed around online till the future mother of my children added me on ICQ. then, knowing she was home i went and gave her computer games. Her computer is so good. It has a DVD player. If I wasn't planning to have kids with her, I'd have them with her 'puter.
Last night was fairly uneventful, went into town to hear Vishala DJing at the Gov's, talked to Tashanaaron for a while and then came home.
Today has been lots of excuses to put of my Knight's Tales assignment. Played a little Sims, got Betty to leave Bob for someone else (a high school science teacher called Geoffrey Lay - spot who was mixing and matching names of textbook spines). Had a bit of a farewell for Katherine, who was like a sister to me when I was little and is now moving to Italy. Played a lot of Dragon Court And generally just stuffed around. But anyway, I should really start my assignment, being that it's saturday evening and the thing is due on monday, and it's big. So now I shall go.
Warten Und Hoffen (Wishin' And Hopin') (Bacharach / David / German Lyrics : Unknown) Warten und hoffen Und hoffen und warten Sehnen und Träumen Tag aus und Tag ein Denn einmal ist jeder allein Das Glück ist überall Weit und nah Darum muss du immer Warten und hoffen und Träumen Auf einmal ist es da Und fragst du den wind und das Meer Sag mir wann, wann kommt er Dan sagt die wind und das Meer, oooohhh Du muss warten, warten und auch hoffen Hoffen und auch Träumen Nur warten und hoffen Und hoffen und warten Sehnen und Träumen Tag aus und Tag ein Dann bist du bald nicht mehr allein Dann wird die Zukunft schön Jahr aus, Jahr ein Und dann musst du nicht mehr warten Und hoffen und hoffen und warten Und auch nicht mehr Träumen Ohh nein, das Glück ist dein Dann sagst du dem Meer und dem Wind Und allen die noch einsam sind. Das eines Tag's das Glück beginnt, ooohh Muss nur warten, warten und auch hoffen Hoffen und auch Träumen Nur warten und hoffen und hoffen und warten Sehnen und Träumen Tag aus und Tag ein Dann bist du bald nicht mehr allein Dann wird die Zukunft schön Jahr aus, Jahr ein. Und dann musst du nicht mehr warten Und hoffen und hoffen und warten Und auch nicht mehr Träumen Oh nein, dass Glück ist dein
11th April 2000
Sunday was me maxing out ways to avoid my Chaucer essay. And that was about as far as it went.
Yesterday, after my classes, I ran home and started the assignment at about 2pm. After two and a half hours of pure mental effort, the essay was done. I even managed tohand it in with fifteen-minutes to spare. I just wish I had proof read it. On the way home I collapsed on Rob's couch, until his watching of "The Stand" drove me to return home to my mother. Yes, that movie is actually THAT bad. And on the way home I managed to talk to that person I always embarrase myself in front of (who we shall now refer to as Crushee1), without embarassing myself. YAY. Though also found out that Crushee1 is a TTR student, which muchly bites.
Today was 9am tutorial finished after only a few minutes as my tutor broke the video. Then I passed, and exchanged pleasantries with Crushee1, putting me a bit of a high before I went to fetch Rachael for Chemistry. Other than that my classes were rather uneventful. My lunchtime visit to Wormgirls, fun but unnoteworthy. In fact the only other noteworthy part of my afternoon was a nice long chat with Saradha while filling in time in the student union.
Then this evening I bought hot cross buns just as an excuse to talk to Crushee1. I am WAY TOO TRAGIC. And after getting over that, I have spent the rest of the evening playing around on dragon court and www.neopets.com.
Anyway, sleep time.
I've walked these streets a virtual stage it seemed to me make up on their faces actors took their places next to me I've walked these streets in a carnival of sights to see all the cheap thrill seekers the vendors and the dealers they crowded around me have I been blind have I been lost inside my self and my own mind hypnotized mesmerized by what my eyes have seen?
13th April 2000
Yesterday, uneventful, unnoteworthy.
Today, better. I walked into uni with Elizabeth, and sat with her through me first two classes. It was a nice change, as I don't really know anyone else in those classes. Then after a very yummy lunch from the Krshna Consciousness, stopped in to bug the-future-mother-of-my-children at her lesbian group and then went to town and paid off my Lego layby. Then I gave in and ordered Spiderwoman, I'll have to go along to Bagend Books and see if I can get the back issues, being that I've missed two or three issues.
On the way home, I crashed at Rob, Saradha and Nina's for a while. And showed off my Lego, which, of course, was fun. And talked about lots of weird stuff with Rob, who I'm becoming reasonably good friends with, and which will prolly get me in trouble with Tina when she reads this.
I'm in love with Sarah Jessica Parker.
And that is about today in a nutshell. "No this is today in a.........."
Ok - so i am the biggest weirdo out there (freaker even than yourself!!!) Ummm...I really don't know what to say other than I am really really sorry for being a big geek and doing dumb things. I constantly amaze myself at how terminally stupid i can be sometimes!!! I'll fully understand if you never want to talk to me again (except maybe to yell foul obscentities at across the street) hmmm...so now what?! I've made kimmy promise to never let me out of the house again by myself - so you should be safe :op Well, i might just go and curl up into a little ball and die somewhere in a corner, so don't be expecting to see me for a while *hugz* from a most apologetic and embarressed worm
17th April 2000
So whats above isn't a song quote, it's an email I got in the weekend (and I will SO not be popular for putting it on here), but more about those circumstances later.
Friday I had my two romanticism classes, which were both quite fun, Wordsworth is actually quite enjoyable, freakishly. Then I sat around uni for a while, met up with Tashanaaron, while Tash was doing homework ran up the Hocken stairs, right to the top, with Aaron, and generally stuffed around. In the evening I hit the town with Tashanaaron and stuffed around generally just having miscellaneous fun. Then when I was on my way home I got hijacked by nice-Peter, who dragged me off to a 21st. I knew a surprising number of people there, but I didn't stay long as I'm really not comfortable around people smoking drugs. Unfortunately, it seems that little time I spent there had been a bit too long as the whole walk home I was seeing things at the edges of my feild of vision, and feeling quite physically ill. But then this is me who can't even take Panadol without an accompanying night-flight to venus.
And now, to explain the email. I got home, spaced, panicky and a touch paranoid. I got my key out from where I keep it hidden, unlocked my door, hung my key on it's hook and started looking for clean PJs, when I realised there was someone sleeping in my bed. And I had thought I was panicky before, now I really flipped. Guess who was SO not in the right state to handle ANY kind of surprise. And it was about then the Wormgirl awoke, strange and apologetic. So about half an hour later I finally kicked her out and got some VERY MUCHLY needed sleep.
Saturday morning, my head felt REALLY big, but my scalp felt like it had shrunk. Fun for me. Then after a nice long sleep in I headed off to town and did me some shopping. I saw my net-stalker but didn't realise it until WAY afterward, as i hadn't been paying any attention, so I'm probably in trouble for being a snob now.
I ended up buying glass tumblers for Nina, Saradha and Rob's flatwarming present, which was wrapped by Tash when she and Aaron met at my place so we could go to it together.
the flatwarming was kinda fun, I didn't know too many people there, but it was nice to see those I did. And I got to dance sleazily with my Becky in front of all her sister's friends. Then as the party began to wind down me, Becky and Becky's date went off clubbing at Fusion. It was great, but then I always have fun when I go out with my Becky. Even with her annoying habit of trying to set me up with EVERYONE around. I even had a nice long talk to my ex's most recent ex, who was paying WAY too much attention to my Becky. She's mine, and I don't want to share her with any other guys. Girls are another matter :oP.
Yesterday, I spent the morning getting Bob Newbie to the top of his occupation stream, and then getting Betty Lay (nee Newbie) most of the way there too. I visited Aaron (not Tashanaaron, but the one with the pecs) for a while and had a bit of a catch up, though I don't talk to him nearly enough, as he is one of my best friends and I very rarely see him. Then I visited Tina, another of my very good friends I don't see nearly enough of. But she had me visiting to give her add-ons for the sims. Then last night I went to nice-Peter's and watched "Heroic Trio" a great Chinatown film, that is even better the second time round.
Today. Hmmm. Classes, with my first one running over time and not finishing till after my next one had started, and Hare Krshna lunch (where i was really obviously drooling over a hot blonde). otherwise it's been an uneventful day.
It’s oh so quiet Shhhh, Shhhh It's, oh, so quiet It's, oh, so still You're all alone And so peaceful until... You fall in love Zing boom The sky up above Zing boom Is caving in Wow bam You've never been so nuts about a guy You wanna laugh you wanna cry You cross your heart and hope to die 'Til it's over and then Shhh, Shhh It's nice and quiet Shhh, Shhh But soon again Shhh, Shhh Starts another big riot You blow a fuse, zing boom The devil cuts loose, zing boom So what's the use, wow bam Of falling in love It's, oh, so quiet It's, oh, so still You're all alone And so peaceful until... You ring the bell, bim bam You shout and you yell, hi ho ho You broke the spell Gee, this is swell you almost have a fit This guy is "gorge" and I got hit There's no mistake this is it 'Til it's over and then It's nice and quiet Shhh, Shhh But soon again Shhh, Shhh Starts another big riot You blow a fuse Zing boom The devil cuts loose Zing boom What's the use Wow bam Of falling in love The sky caves in The devil cuts loose You blow blow blow blow blow your fuse When you've fallen in love Ssshhhhhh...
19th April 2000
Yesterday, hmm. Typical Tuesday. Tutorial at 9am, and as usual I was late. Followed by other classes which were all quite uneventful. I spent all lunch time trying to find somewhere that stocked a bit for my electric shaver that had broke (just to find once I found somewhere that stocked it, that I had lost the model number and had to go back and get it today, and it was WAY expensive). And then I came home after Anglo-Saxons for a quiet night. Or so I thought. But in the end it was a night of talking with Amy, and having the whole Friday night thing properly explained. Is everyone in my life so DAMN screwy?
Today. More uneventful classes, me noticing - with a sudden hit of lust - two members of my Romanticism class who I'd only ever seen enough to find cute. It's amazing how you can go from merely finding someone cute, to really wanting to sleep with them just from hearing them read extracts from a Lewis Carrol poem. It's just a shame it wasn't my tutorial, they'd be so much more fun if my usual stream had that sort of eye-candy.
Then this arvo I filled in on my brothers paper run, which is pseudo-exercise. And since then I've been online and avoiding my homework. Which is due tomorrow and I really should start. So this is me saying 'Night all", *waves*"Night all".
Weeeeeeellllllllllllllll.... My mum's a bitch She's a big fat bitch She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide word
22th April 2000
Thursday was BAD. I had that Chem report hanging over me something chronic, and I had put WAY too much work into it. I spent more time on it than I have on any of my arts assignments, which are worth more, and still got nowhere with it, and will be lucky to get 30%.
In brighter Thursday news, my first two major assignments are back. A B in my Anglo-Saxon one, and an A- in my Romanticism one. And I got 95% in my Old English Pronouns test. Yippee.
Yesterday was Good Friday. I wasted a good chunk of the day watching videos in bed. 54 and The Opposite of Sex, both of which are darn good movies. Following this I trotted over and spent some time at Tina's. It was fun for a while. And while there Tina convinced me that I had to go to a party-ish thing Nina was throwing for Good Friday. Supoosedly a big eating fish and being good catholics thing, that ended up with everyone just eating fast food, before rushing off to Nina's flat to watch Freaks and Geeks. (this is such bad prose, I'm SO glad I don't have to read it) And I didn't get much further, I sat on their couch and watched TV and talk to Rob till the itty bitty hours of this morning.
Today I have slowly been getting closer and closer to slaying my mother. I played a little Dragon Court. Ran into town and bought easter eggs, got a ridde home with someone I don't know the name of, but who lives on my street. And thats really about my day.
I SO WANT TO KILL ME MOTHER. She is being SUCH a cow about everything. I hope she dies really painfully. She is on this whole big thing about me not doing anything around the house, though I do FAR more than my share already. And she keeps telling me I'm disgustingly fat and that I have to keep my paper run up as without the exercise I'll get even fatter. Even though I was given Doctor's orders to quit as it is screwing up my neck.
Anyone want my mother? She's going free.
DON'T EXPECT ME TO BE YOUR FRIEND written by Lobo I stopped sending flowers to your apartment You said you aren't home much anymore I stopped dropping by without an appointment Cause I'd hear laughter coming through your door. Sometimes late at night you'll still call me Just before you close your eyes to sleep You make me vow to try and stop by sometime Baby that's a promise I can't keep. I love you too much to ever start liking you So lets just let the story kinds end I love you too much to ever start liking you So don't expect me to be your friend. I don't walk down through the village or other places That we used to go to all the time I'm trying to erase you from my memory Cause thinking of you jumbles up my mind. You always act so happy when I see you You smile that way you take my hand and then Introduce me to your latest lover That's when I feel the walls start crashing in. copyright 1972 Kaiser Music / Famous Music
24th April 2000
Saturday night I headed out with my Becky, her woman and some of their friends and saw Fucking Amal (the really is the title of the movie). It was a really cute lil' feel good coming of age movie. This was followed by a trip to The Pool House Cafe. Cliche, I know. Typical lesbians. So there I was, me and about six lesbians having a night on the town. And three guesses which one of us stuck out like a sour thumb. It was fun though, and I'm beginning to suspect Anita may have some tolerance for me; not much but it's a start.
Yesterday was split between playing The Sims and visiting relatives. Both reasonably fun ways of wasting time. And it was good to see my Aunt Jude and her lot, as I very rarely see them. I am SUCH a bad nephew, never visiting, etc.. etc..
Last night I went on IRC for the first time in ages, being that lent is now over. And it's even duller, and the people on it are even thicker than I remembered; and believe me, that takes effort.
Oh, and for Easter mother gave me a big-ish egg and a Canon Pocket Sized Organiser. Which seems all nice and good of her but gifts from my mother ALWAYS come at a cost, so I'll end up having to pay for it somehow, it's just that - as yet - I have no idea what form said payment will take.
And now it's Easter Monday and I'm sitting round home bored, bored and waiting for mother to finishing using the net connection I pay for to download some crap warez no-one except her would want. I SO have to move out of this house, it just means getting my act together and finding somewhere else before I go completely insane (Oi, don't even thinking about saying "go?"). And then I'll have my internet access password changed. The only reason she even found out anyway, is because she had promised to pay half of the cost. That lasted like a week before she decided she was above paying. And people wonder why I dispise her.
Anyway, this is turning into a pointless wench-bashing, so I'll finish now. Later.
Sha la la la la la My oh my Look like the boy too shy Come on, kiss the girl
26th April 2000
Well, Monday gota tad better after I visited the high-lord of boredom. And that was the least boring part of the day.
Yesterday, Anzac Day, was even more house-bound. I spent it setting up, and then playing "Might and Magic VIII". And it is SO frustrating. It's not that hard, but it all takes SO LONG. My attention span is SO puny.
Today I was supposed to go shopping with Rob, but I took The Sims to his place, and after setting it up, and showing him how to play it, and talking for a while it was too late. So now it'll have to happen tomorrow. And that was about my day.
And I have finally got sick of Dragon Court.
You were the love for certain of my life you were simply my beloved wife I don't know for certain how I'll live my life now alone without my beloved wife my beloved wife I can't believe I've lost the very best of me
30th April 2000
Well, it's been a few days since I've written anything, hmmmmmm, what do I recall.
Thursday, I finally went shopping with Rob. Spent a few hours wandering around the op-shops in town and ended up buying stuff from ECHO. Though Rob did buy a couple of second-hand CDs there, so it was still in the spirit of things, kinda.
Then that night Nina, Rob, my Becky, her Anita and I went to DOGMA. It was SO much fun. One of the most enjoyable movies I've seen in a while. A little dark, quite sacriligious, overall very good. But then I'm easy to amuse/entertain/please.
Friday, I got up in the morning and started on my paper run, looked at the paper and saw a couple of photos featuring people I knew, didn't think much of it. Got home, started reading the paper and OH MY GOD, someone from my fourth form class - who was in my circle of friends then, but whom i haven't talked to since, and prolly wouldn't have even waved if I'd passed him in the street lately - died. It wasn't as if we'd even been close, in fact the only reason I was in the circle of friends is because Jen and Mel felt sorry for the class social reject. And that hit me really hard, not that I was overly upset about him, it was just that someone I had gone to school with, who was my age, and who I knew, had died. And as I always do, I made it all about me and had a Mortality Epiphany. So between then and now, the only times I've left the house were: to get fish and chips on friday night; for my paper run on saturday morning; to cross my little brother across North Road; and to go to my Grandmother's for tea this evening.
The rest of the weekend, when I was supposed to be madly catching up on all the homework/readings I should have done in the first half-semester, I've been wallowing in my own mortality/depression/filth. I am SO pathetic. Someone should slap me with a REALLY big slapstick. I've done nothing fun or productive all weekend. I've just sat wasting my life away.
Though someone kinda cute, who I'm pretty sure was at my high school a year or two behind me, checked me out when I was getting my little brother cross the road. That would be a good thing, except at the time I had serious first thing in the morning hair, and was wearing old warn-almost-seethru mildly raggedy track pants, and a t-shirt almost the same colour. Not my prettiest setting.
Anyway, this is now heading into the pointless zone, do do, do do...... etc.
so Bye.
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