Wednesday, I think I may have just sulked much of the day away. And I had a nurse from my doctors office ring to say I needed to make a doctors appointment in response to the last blood-test results I had. Appointment was already made and had already gone through that test result set with the endocrinologist. Showering and dressing on Wednesday only happened so I could go to role-playing, which was cancelled by Carla and Ian still had me over to play Wingspan instead. So it was a nice evening.
Thursday I went and saw my GP to follow up on all the things. He was very calming, removing all the doom and gloom and pointing out that the risks I was made to feel super bad amount are actually pretty minute differences and stressing about it was likely just as bad. Having a GP who has also had some serious thyroid issues (and now doesn't have one) makes it much easier to realise it isn't going to be a huge deal. Though he did point out that if I need the surgery I am going to have a wicked scar. I think he meant it as a positive, clearly failing to understand my aversion to attention that I haven't specifically requested.
Then the day got weird.
Barely a block from my GPs office, I bumped into Shitlord's best friend who greeted me unexpectedly warmly before telling me I need to visit the restaurant. When I mentioned I would still prefer to avoid "that other guy" he told me "that other guy" was gone from there, gone from the country, in fact, for months. I was so happy I had to restrain the urge to try and hug him. I have spent so much of the last year avoiding town out of anxiety about bumping into Shitlord, and now I know he was one of those cocks who moved countries during the pandemic. And all without either of us saying his name.
Then only a few blocks later Shitlord's car pulls up beside me being driven by a stranger. And someone who was not old, fat or ugly, so not someone Shitlord would ever date. He needs them desperate to put up with how poorly he treats them. So clearly the universe had picked the day for me to find out the city was safe from my ex.
Friday morning I went to the pool with Midget. It was pleasant to swim and chat. First time I had talked to her this year so there was plenty to chat about. Also spotted someone I went to high school with who I never noticed much at school but who has grown up to be a super hot middle aged man. Possibly (I have found a couple of other people much hotter than I normally would have since then - I think the Shitlord revelation may be messing with my head (the intrusive thoughts are high and about dumb things)).
Today I went to the movies. A thing that still feels weird post-COVID. I saw Rūrangi, it was really good. And the lead actor was attractive enough to me that I started worrying that the fact I find trans-men to be very handsome statistically more often than cis-men may be problematic. I am pretty confident it isn't a weird thing, I think it is just that the biological processes involved leads to a slightly higher chance of handsome face.
And then there has been more cleaning of Lego and throwing out of stuff. I threw out all my holey underwear even if the holes were very minor (I still have more than will fit in the drawer), and did a lazier version of the same with socks (I lacked concern enough to check thoroughly). And I threw out all my ripped jeans as they had been untouched for years. In the process I discovered I can fit 88cm jeans again. The weirdness of my body is making me skinnier below the belt while all the fat migrates to my mid section.
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