November 2005
Too long sick has put me behind - time to catch up or die.
3rd November 2005 - Wenefred, V. and Mart.
Monday night I broke out in an allergic reaction to something. It was a worry as I had started new meds that day and it had me worried stuff was going wrong. I think it was probably the dodgy indian things I got for lunch, as they were the only thing I can think that I did different on Monday.
Tuesday, I worked somewhat unproductively in the office and had a quiet night at home watching crap movies on DVDs borrowed from my mother - without exactly asking (or telling her). Did have lunch with Michiel though - so something noteworthy happened.
Yesterday I went in to the office then off to my weekly brain poking. Then after lunch with my father I stayed in the office working until after six. Then swung past the public library before meeting Oli, Bridget, Lyall, Erin and a couple of Oli's cousins at the Outback for dinner. Tasty pub food.... After the pub dinner I visited Stu for a while, mostly to drop of Stardust as part of my plan to indoctrinate everyone I know on Neil Gaiman. It was good. I should be social-like more often.
Today I spent mostly in the office. Though featured an entertaining lunch with Meg. About three in the afternoon I got a nasty migraine that was doing funny things to my thinking. I kept confusing word meanings, often with antonyms. What I was reading was making no sense as a result thereof, and talking to people had humorous results. So I can home for a nap. I decided to have an orange, and in peeling it I put a sharp knife through the orange and into my finger. Orange juice inside a cut is unpleasant. And so much blood for not that large a cut.
6th November 2005 - Leonard, Ab.
Today I've been feeling full on depressed for the first time in ages. I guess it means the anger at Simon I've been running on since slightly before things officially blew up has finally burned out. Anger turns out to be kind of useful.
Friday I was generally just feeling weird all day - post migraine squishy-head-ness, I think. Spent the day in the office, but it wasn't as productive as it might have been. Evening was spent well invested in television.
Saturday I watched some Xena, reading all my old Spider-Woman comics and felt hungry all the freaking time. In the evening I went to a pot-luck of Midget's, then firework down near varsity. Midget's pet homosexual is very much bringing out my inner evil bigot of doom. I was left wishing a fiery death on all fags after only a small amount of time in his presence.
Today I was still feeling hungry all the freaking time. Ate far too many apples - suspect I'll not be feeling so great tomorrow. Maybe I have worms.
I should go sleep, it is late.
7th November 2005.
I'm currently masticating on a long hard cylindrical rock candy. Lizzie reurned from gallivanting with the gift of Brighton Rock. Wahoo for sugar.
Last night after writing the above entry I headed to bed and discovered I was all allergic reaction-ee again. Can't work out what the days had in common. Oh well.
Today I headed to the office and got through a lot of reading, but very little writing. Spent far too much money on nothing... well, paid of my large dentist bill entirely so it stops hanging over me - couldn't really afford to but I felt it needed done. The nice weather unleashing my inner misanthrope (which is bubbling just under the surface at the best of times recently), the walk home had me wishing skin cancer of all the attractive young scantily dressed students sun bathing around the North-end. When I got home Stu messaged me inviting me around for dinner. Seemed a good plan so off I headed. He made a good dinner - as much as he seems to think it wasn't. I shall have to let him feed me more often. Made for a good evening.
One worry though. I think I'm a crappy friend. I've noticed my social circle really isn't what it once was, and people I used to be good friends with rarely even reply to my emails now they've scattered across the world. It's disturbing. I've also realised a lot of my friends don't think I'm a particularly nice or likeable person. I may have to work on that, or just become a crazy old hermit who eats the neighbours' cats.
8th November 2005 - The Four Crowned Martyrs.
Today my head cold and ear infection came back to bite me. I was all getting used to being well and then today happened, with stumbling like a drunk and being all retarded like a retard. Annoys me most because it made me miss the post-grad bouncy castle function/protest.
I ended up spending much of the day in bed, did finish my slow reread of the sixth Harry Potter. Still can't decided if Snape is evil or not. If he isn't I will be pleasantly surprised with Rowling, but I suspect he will be.
I'm sick enough to be missing being social with Oliver and company - I should probably stop being up and go sleep.
There was a show. Not that many people saw it in broad terms, but it was beloved. Full of humor, love and pain. And though it was a hard-sell emsemble piece with no huge names it in, it got made into a (roughly) 40 million dollar pic -- and with the cast intact. That doesn't happen a lot, but it should, and it did with this film.
11th November 2005 - Martin, Bp. and Conf. Mem. of S. Menna, Mart.
I went to Serenity last night with Stu (I uncharacteristically shouted him for his birthday). It was amazing. I want to rant about it but that would lead to spoilers, which is bad. The movie is great.
Anyway, Wednesday my ears were a little better, but it was still pretty unpretty. I spent the day in the office, getting a fair bit of reading done but little else of note. I did decide along with my supervisor that I'm not to find new secondary sources for my thesis, it is time to stop reading and start writing.
Yesterday, I was feeling much better. I pulled a longer than usual day in the office staying until after 6pm. I finally finished the Lecklider book I was fighting my way through - such dry criticism on Cleanness (a pretty dry poem to start with). Then I headed into town to pickup a book from the library so I can lend it to Oli, and maybe Meg afterward, and then headed to Stu's for dinner. Dinner was great, he cooked some very tasty bolognese. I also got to meet his personable and extremely nice to look at new flatmate. Something that confirmed the fact I am too picky for my own good. I see someone so out of my league that I don't have a snowflakes chance with and I think, nah, not what I want. I have issues.
Joss speaks - all should read.
Kaylee Frye: Goin' on a year now I ain't had nothin' twixt my nethers weren't run on batteries!
Capt. Malcolm Reynolds: Oh, God! I can't *know* that!
Jayne Cobb: I could stand to hear a little more.
14th November 2005 - Translation of S. Erkenwald, Bp.
Friday day was unexentful, and lead to an evening of staying home and watching Veronica Mars.
Saturday I lay in bed reading The Wee Free Men until I was almost late for Meg's birthday lunch in town. I got there in time though, which is what matters. It made for a fun time of socialness with some people I knew and some I didn't. Then home again and back to the book, finishing it off in time to head to Higgin's 21st. I didn't stay at that one long as I decided against drinking (with the questionable functioning of my ears still) and it was pretty much just a piss up. Instead it was off to Shelley's birthday at the Poolhouse. Her friends are all so damn pretty. I think I only out prettied the two token chubby uggo guys (I may have been token chubby uggo number three), otherwise I was way behind the crowd. Not only were they all beautiful people, but they were so very, very geeky. It was a good night though. Pool makes people social like, and it was a fun atmosphere. Had a nice long chat to Nina's lil brother there too, mostly about how I crap I am at keeping in touch with her. He had some choice quote, which may have come from drunken philosophy or possibly from somewhere else (I don't know him well enough to know). He said that friends fill a certain need in each otherwise lives, and when that needs is gone the friendship fades away - and that it is natural and not something to take to heart. It seemed to make sense at the time, but has been bugging me ever since.
After leaving Shelley's thing about 11:30 I made the impulse decision to go dancing. Wasn't an intelligent plan, but turned out to be ok. I haven't been dancing in such a long time the effect was that of a washing machine suffering a grand mal seizure (maybe not grand mal, as I think it implies rhythmic convulsions - and I had no rhythm). Not pretty at all. Though I did start chatting up a pretty dutch blonde (maybe the dutch bit implies the blonde bit, but just ending on the dutch thing would have required the use of dutchy, which may be a bit offensive - put that way, what was I thinking, of course I should have gone with it and said "pretty blonde wooden-shoe-wearing, windmill-loving, dyke-building dutchy....), who was quite openly after some cliche pretty boy, but after failing to achieve anything on that front walked part of the way home with me. I guess I come across as pretty harmless, but am still large enough to be used as a human shield against those less harmless. Or something like that.
Yesterday, I spent mostly in bed reading (A Hat Full of Sky, and then starting in to Red Dust (which someone I'd lent it to has folded the corner of pages to keep their place in - grrrr at all page corner folders everywhere)). Semi-caught up with Oli in getting him the book I had for him. Otherwise just relaxing and recovering from the dancing till four in the morning thing.
Today I spent in the office doing work. Completely unexciting and a bit painful. The dancing after years of not seems to have done unpleasant things to my back muscles. Actually, this morning I decided that Simon was right to rescue himself from my crappy friendship and that maybe any need I was filling in anyone's life was all an illusion and that I should really just not exist in anyones lives, as I'm clearly not in anyway helpful for anyone. This was added to by an argument with the midget after which I decided I really should just have nothing to do with anyone ever again. Being in the office actually cheered me up - which is disturbing and wrong. Come the evening I was getting pissed off at my crappy Latin translation skills and walked home with Michiel when the office closed up for the night. After I parted ways with him I passed Bridget, who seems to have stopped disliking me. For some reason this made me very happy, and I have no idea why.
15th November 2005 - Machutus, Bp. and Conf. Mem. of S. Menna, Mart.
Rats from a sinking ship. I moult friends like cat hair.
People suck. Happy misanthropy seems the only sensible plan. How can misanthropy go wrong? Why did I waste all these years trying to see the good in people?
I should go have breakfast, the having of blood sugar may be required just now.
17th November 2005 - Hugh, Bp. and Conf. Middle lessons of S. Anianus.
Slightly concerned something is up with my glucagon. The last few days I have been kind of whacked in the head until I've eaten. This is a bit worrying. Blood sugar levels should manage themselves well enough not to lead to massive hunger related insanity. Well, maybe after massive hunger but not after normal sleep hunger which is barely hunger at all.
Okay, other than the pre-breakfast nuttiness I've not much to say for the recent days. They have been spent at varsity reading some liturgy and fighting to translate me some Latin - my Latin skills are very rusty. I got there in the end though, only got screwed by missing a parellel construction and thus being unable to translate a tricky word (vernantibus). Even once I'd worked out my mistake and got it all translated nicely it still stuck out as a stupid word.
My evenings have been equally unnoteworthy, having been spent reading Red Dust, I had forgotten how good it was. Now that I've finished it - as of a few minutes ago having gone back to bed to read after eating - I think I shall have to break out another Paul J. McAuley.
Today was uneventful. Very unproductive office time ate up the day, that and a slightly long lunch with my father. After work I drop past Paul Hunt's farewell drinks, it left me wondering who in the department 1st year girls will have to drool over now, there really isn't anyone of his calibre. Poor sad first year girls.
Simon has made it so I can see when he is online, it's been that way a few days and it is bugging me. I suspect it was either accidental or it is some kind of test. Assuming the latter then whatever I can do I pretty much guarantee I'll fail, so I'm ignoring him. This will probably also lead to failing the test, but since I'm failing anyway I might as well go with the option that doesn't require me to do anything. I should just prune him off my trillian list but I still can't bring myself to do it. I keep thinking I should be able to rebuild the friendship - I realise this proves me a crazy person. Especially considering the friendship may have been entirely in my head to begin with... actually, looking at it that way.....
Bad brain, time I take it off to bed.
18th November 2005 - Oct. of S. Martin.
It occurs to me that mentioning I'm being testing probably also means I've failed. Woot.
Andrew: Nobody was immune to her trail of destruction. Not friends, not family, not even the most pacifist and logical of races
Amanda: What the hell are you talking about? I thought Faith killed a volcanologist.
Andrew: Silly, silly Amanda. Why would Faith kill a person who studies Vulcans?
19th November 2005 - Oct. of S. Martin.
Yesterday at lunch I picked up Anansi Boys from the public library. Last night and this morning went to reading it. It is a very enjoyable read. Probably the lightest read Neil Gaiman has penned since Stardust, but light is good when done well. Also a nice change in tone after his last novel for adults.
Just as I was finishing the book I got a call from Whitcoulls to say my copy of the book I had ordered was in store. So after swimming with Meg I managed to get to the store just before five and pick up my very own trade paperback copy of Anansi Boys. Very pleasing. The trade very has a different lay out, which isn't as nice, but does have "exclusive content" (books with bonus features - what has the DVD phenomenon done to our culture?).
Not much else to say for myself. Having a quiet Saturday night in watching bad tv and trying to decide if Si being visible again means I'm allowed to talk to him or not.
 | You scored as Ron Weasley. You often feel like second best and as a result don't have an awful lot of self confidence, but a truer more capable friend would be hard to find.
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Your Harry Potter Alter Ego Is...?
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22nd November 2005 - Cecilia, V. and Mart.
Sunday I was going to go to the office and do work but I felt a little off and just could bring myself to actually go in. Instead I ended up spending a chunk of the afternoon at Oliver's, drinking Hollandia and watching the rugby. My alcohol tolerance has got even more humorously tiny than it used to be.
Yesterday, I spent the day in the office and the evening slacking around the house eating junk food.
Today - repeat of yesterday, except with my father taking me to lunch and with Oli popping around this evening to return a book I'd lent him and then leaving with the surprise gift of an old hard drive I had lying around and he's the only person I know with a computer old enough for him to benefit from it. I'm just a little concerned it may have stuf still on it - but I'm pretty sure anything on it would just be pirate software. I also got angry at my desk and cleaned it up a bit. It had stuff on it from when I was with Shiny - I really should tidy my room more often.
24th November 2005 - Chrysogonus, Mart.
I've been having a run of thinking things I shouldn't about my friends recently. The other day I caught myself noticing that someone I've been friends with more years than I have fingers is kind of attractive. This is not the sort of thought I should ever be having. Evil traitorous bits of my brain should be behaving, not fancying people that ought never be fancied. I also found myself thinking some much less generous thoughts about one of my 'work' friends. We were chatting around the department and I picked up something being said that probably wasn't meant to be said and which left me thinking a bit. I seem to have a nasty knack of picking up the implications that people don't want picked up from things that they say - possibly due to over-thinking in response to my own paranoia (technically not paranoia but anxiety - my shrink seems to think it is important that I pay attention to the difference) that I let nasty parts of the back of my brain slip out just detectably in otherwise innocent comments I make. So basically the ungenerous thoughts were unfair of me as one should never hold someone's subconscious against them - but it did leave me thinking that if I heard the same from someone I wasn't already friendly with I'd possibly maintain some distance and refrain from becoming friendly in the first place. Seems I'm a judgemental arse. Come on, you could at least pretend to be surprised.
Yesterday, I was achieving bucket loads of sweet fuck all in the office. Mid-afternoon I skivved off and met up with my father and brother. As such I got to see Serenity again, and at my father's expense. It was worth seeing a second time, as I picked up a couple of details I'd misheard the first time, and was distracted by my own hyperventilating.
Last night I had a nice long chat to Tina. I miss her a lot. London is too damn far away. It was good to chat up though, even if around the world telephony has a creepy delay. It may not be much, I doubt it was even half a second, but it is strangely creepy. Also slightly disturbing was that the call included me being filled in on the details of the lives of people living much, much closer to me - but from whom I no longer ever really hear anything.
I should stop slacking around and go to varsity. At this rate I'll not be there till lunch time. I just really am not good at mornings recently. Getting up and out of the house seem to be an entirely not happening thing. Not helped by the fact I'm tired all the freaking time, no matter how sensible a sleep pattern I try to inflict on myself.
Stupid tiredness. In lighter news, I think I'm putting back on all the weight I lost - so may soon be able to use my leather belt again, which will be nice.
27th November 2005.
Thursday arvo went to work, and in the evening I had dinner with Alana and landed myself an FHM Girl a Day calendar for next year.
Friday morning was another slow start. I made it in in time for morning tea, then spent the day hating my thesis until five when I headed to the OUSA postgrad end of year function and proceeded to get very drunk while attempting to socialise with people I don't really know and am unlikely to ever know any better. I need to make friends go next time, trusting people to be there was a stupid plan. After one beer I could already feel the effects of the alcohol, so I washed it down with a couple more. By which stage I was a little stumbly and generally feeling like a complete pillock. I was also in the bad drunk place. Not a great plan. But I was home and drunkenly frying fish in time to watch Veronica Mars. I spent the evening feeling very lonely and being an unpleasant drunk at a very forgiving Russell over msn whilst resisting the growing urge to message someone I'm not sure I'm allowed to.
Saturday morning I woke up bright and early to read some Harry Potter, watch morning cartoons and then break out Alana's DVDs of the Muppet Show's first season. Muppetty goodness. I was supposed to go to my cousin Breffni's birthday party, but I'd failed to organise transport and it was well out of walking distance. SO I had a quiet day in instead. Late evening my Harry Potter reading was disturbed by Midget taking me out and socialising me. It was good. Even if my budget shan't forgive the unnecessary expenditure.
Today I arsed around, went to the office and achieved bugger all, and went to my grandparents for dinner. A day of excitement.
29th November 2005 - SS. Saturninus and Sisinnius. With Nocturn. Vigil.
What is with the letter 'g'. In Times New Roman is looks nothing like the way I write it, whereas the rest of the alphabet pretty much does. And attempts to write it in the double loop way lead to failure.
Shelley was surprised by the fact I'm obese when I mentioned it last week. She bought herself a lot of good will with the one.
Yesterday was spent at the office failing to achieve as much as I thought I would. I was abducted by Meg in the afternoon so she could come and play the Sims 2: Nightlife. Socialness is good.
Today had a retardedly late start. After doing laundry and ringing WINZ and chatting to people on the way in it was after 12 before I got to the office. Such slackness. The afternoon was mostly unproductive, and my supervisor has been very clear about us needing a meeting this week.
I should go read a bit more Harry Potter, Stu is taking me to the movie tonight and my re-read is incomplete. Also feeling like I should feel a little jewed that he is taking me on cheap night to repay my taking him to Serenity. This is crazy talk though as Serenity was for his birthday and thus doesn't require repayment. I think I'm just proving myself a bad person.
30th November 2005 - Andrew, Ap.
I saw Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire last night and I was unimpressed. Possibly it was just that Shelley had talked it up, or possibly because I have disliked all the movies. It was good to hang out with Stu for a bit though, even if I had an attack of insanity that left me feeling like I was crashing an evening out between he and Reece, one of our mutual friends.
Today I had my last brain poking for the year, it went okay even if I chunk of it went to complaining about the movie. The rest of the day mostly went to a small amount of thesis work which took a long time. I bumped into Scott twice, he was all finished with his thesis and it's all bound and pretty. I'm quite jealous. I still haven't managed to take him out for a celebratory drink though - even after offering to shout. At least it sounds like he will be in town a while - giving me more time to try and force my friendship upon him.
I'm the creepy guy who tries to hard.
Ah well.
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