Holes, and living at the bottom of them.

So I have pretty much just been depression spiralling the whole time since I got home.

It is not great.  I am barely leaving the house and when I do it leads to public crying, in front of strangers, rather too often.

So failing at life.

In happier news, I went to Avengers: Endgame with the semi-imaginary one on Wednesday.  It had a lot of screens showing it and seemed to be sold out everywhere.  I guess it will do very well.

And for the past two weeks I have had plumbers in my flat basically every second day.  There are multiple leaks running into the apartment below mine.  Part of one got fixed, the rest might all be one thing happening somewhere under my floor and running over the concrete.  So they are threatening exploratory ripping up of my floors - which will suck.

And only this week I finally gave the best of the gifts I bought in Canada to its intended recipient.  Catching up with my friends is something I do so very frequently....

I suck at humaning.

Joy

Starting Monday morning on the phone to WINZ.  (Mostly just on hold with WINZ).
Such fun.

I found out just after their call centre closed on Friday that the information they gave me when I had called earlier in the week (when they said everything was sorted and fine) was utterly false and my benefit had been cut off.

Many factors make it seem like they were just being jerks on purpose.  Like the fact that my lasts-two-years medical paperwork that happens in October suddenly happens in March now, and that they sent the forms and require they be returned all while they know I am out of the country.


Result of the phone call, I am not getting paid until I do the stuff they explicitly told me I didn't need to do when I called last week.

Because WINZ are jerks it was even phrased with a "Sorry for the misinformation you received but...".

And somehow I doubt they will back pay once it is sorted again.  So basically they just fuck me over for the fun of it.


[Edit of some hours later]

A nice woman at the Dunedin office just fixed almost all of it for me in minutes.  I will be penalised about $7 this week and have to get a medical certificate by next week.  But thanks to a non-jerk in the sea of jerks, I am pretty much sorted and rescued from a pit of panic.

[Edit of some more hours later]

Dad invited me out for dinner.  I should have said no.  All it proved was that I am still to sick of Evelyn's making things into unnecessary drama.  Having a fit about how I am starting a fight just because I decline to change my opinion to one that i have just been ordered to have is not a productive way of interacting.
I am sick of how every interaction between us seems to have something being thrown at me just so I can be vilified for not playing alone.  After how Evelyn declared, near the end of the trip, that my exasperated eye rolling was a treat to kill and an act of violence on her person, I have lost all patience for playing along.

So human fail

I have spent the week since I got back splitting my time between sickness, exhaustion, jet lag and depression spiralling.

Seriously not winning at being a person, and what little I have seen of my family since has just made things much much worse.

Catch up posts will hopefully happen when I am a bit more collected.