I was just reminded of something that made me realise today was the ten year anniversary of being played.
I had been invited to a shitty movie by Shitlord, after a couple of month of no actual in person contact, and romantic relation built only on the texts required to keep some amount of control over me. So the day had started around the plan of having the "this isn't working, we don't see each other, I'm not sure we like each other, we should probably break up" conversation.
By the end of the conversation we sat down to have after the shitty movie he had somehow talked me into dropping the L-bomb, made awkward by the fact that the moment I said it I knew I didn't mean it but having said it still counted for something almost a year and a half into a relationship (it wouldn't become clear it was really more of a situationship until later). He returned the L-bomb substantially later in the day.
And it wasn't until years later that I realised how much I had been manipulated. The whole time really.
Every time I tried to get out, it turned into the rare occasions of him actually seeming like a good boyfriend for a bit.
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