Progress unmade

I thought I was making progress today.
Met a new person socially, with the implication there might be physical distraction but definitely not a relationship going forth.  Which was flattering and seemed like a healthy thing to be considering in my current position.

Otherwise just spent the day hiding from the terrible weather.

Then just as my delivereasy bibimbap was arriving I got a message from someone claiming to be Shitlord's partner of six years and demanding answers.  He had enough information to make it pretty clear he was at least partially telling the truth.
So yeah, Shitlord had multiple other people running at the same time, and one seems to have been from before me.
The attempts to convince myself he is a vaguely decent guy who just got caught in a mistake he didn't know how to fix are now over.  He is not a decent guy.  It was not a mistake.  It was a pattern of him being an arsehole who just uses people.

And it hurts more than it has any reason to.
I had not realised how much hope I was pegging on him somehow being someone I could forgive and be friends with again.


And I sent a message to his flatmates explaining that I would not ever be likely to rejoin the social group - they were very nice about it.


Now off to cry some more.
Because it really fucking hurts.