Disclaimer

Though a "Diary" my online diary is a work of FICTION.

It may at times strongly reflect actual events of my life, often how I honestly perceived them and display my genuine reactions. But not always and everything contained within should be treated as a fiction.

This is also a personal diary, so by reading it you are violating my privacy. And as it is a personal diary you are not allowed to hold anything you read in it against me, as you shouldn't have been reading it anyway.

Also, this diary is not to be read by anyone who has gone out with me, would like to go out with me in the future, or suspects I may like to go out with them.






Click Here for the old site, as backed up by Wayback Machine (I have gone with the 2007 version as it is the latest that is still before vodafone crunched a bunch of my files)

Thursday, 19 September 2019

He is the second worst. The worst will be even more appealing and even more unavailable

So.  So much has happened today.
It is like Tuesday of last week but with more finality.

Shitlord came around this morning as predicted, he had taken my anger but lack of actual refusal as consent (which is a thing....).  Fortunately Tina arrived at basically the same time and scolded him while I did his forms.

Just after I bumped into his flatmates in town, who were pretty clear that they thought I should not even give him my friendship.

Then lunch with Oli, and some general pottering around.

Just before six I stupidly messaged the new guy - well, replied to his message, to apologise to writing off said message before I deleted him.

He felt the need to talk, a lot.  So much.  He just wouldn't stop even when I asked him to.
Telling his side of things and making it clear I have been second fiddle to something that was actually running the whole time.  Basically 4 of the 5 years I have been with Shitlord I have been being two-timed.  But the other guy got FAR more effort put in.

Also, that it all started about the same time the Shitlord started dropping L-bombs.  Meaning it has all been lies.  All of it, except maybe the few months at the start.
And it is making that pathological narcissist thing seem slightly more likely.

I think the new guy may have been playing me for information as once I was too worked up to understand anything he started pushing the personal questions, some involving conversations I only had with Shitlord in the last couple of days.


Anyway, my ride is arriving.  Off to be babysat.  I don't trust myself to be alone.

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